I just wanted to take a minute and welcome Colleen to my account. After more than 200 submissions for my account from twitter and tumblr, I made the final decision to hand my account over to @artismyporn tonight at midnight.
Colleen is a tremendously funny lady with a sense of humor that I personally have admired since I first started on twitter. I think she'll do my account proud and I'm certain that you'll all fall madly and deeply in love with her.
I want to take a minute to give a big thank you to @getoffendedBone. When I told him I was leaving, I first wanted him to just tweet tit and vag jokes from my account. With 5,000 followers, I figured he could use it to his advantage. He refused. Then I asked him to just shut his account down and move to mine and tweet his own stuff there. With 5,000 followers, why let it go to waste. He refused. I didn't want to just twittercide... Travis refused to take over my account... we came up with a plan.
I think that plan was successful today. We (I say "we" loosely as Travis pulled the "it's all your decision" card and made me do this on my own) are handing my account over to someone I feel will do it justice and hopefully get a lot of joy out of it in return.
Take note people, when someone leaves twitter, they don't all just vanish for no reason or go down in a hate fueled rage of "fuck you and fuck you too and you're shits not funny". I'm going out with a smile, a wave and a kiss goodbye. I love you all and thank you for the laughs, the joy, the fun and the friendships.
A few thank you's before I go:
@getoffendedBone @_Vaginasaurus @Love_Gunn @pixiebelz @snowness @2ndcitysaint @ronniewk @im_tricia @theblessmess @PortlandiaGirl @idstandonthat @lastpodstanding @EasilyTempted @badadvicenurse @thethryll @poppa_steve @thebestmonkey @funsizdprincess @tamytoo2 @islander_DI @slashleen @angrylittlebee @freckless @ trialfemme @travelmonkey @redwithevny @eviloi @slyoung5 @dietredbull @ragekat @BohoPoetGirl @PlatinumShower @Cherhole @shariv67 @goldengateblond @littleharmonica @momfia @sugartits84 @billmc7 @mrfornicator @molly_kats @vagstar @UNTRESSOR @StellaRtwot @schwat @HairyJew4Life @rodney_at_large @cfishing @outofgrips @hannahantics @dumbnotdeaf @relocatable @happyhourjack @yolanda5angels @llvvzz @hoochified @filthyrichmond @tweetlebee @kervinf @wittyclitty @redicupidity @tylr1717 @Coy0teUgly @heyitslori @therealladyluck @ticking_tocking @pyrbliss @beingtheo @CroweJam @HaHaWhitePPL @lunchyprices @dannydogmouth @PaulyPeligroso @crocpunch @Paxochka @DrTwittenheimer @shelbyfero